Is it just me or you don’t really realise how drunk you are until you are in a bathroom alone???

thanks to tumblr literally every time i go to the bathroom when i’m drunk i think about this post and sit there laughing to myself trying not to fall off the toilet

gritty both capturing the zeitgeist as usual AND educating me on the availability of free flow butter at american cinemas

me when one of my girlmutuals posts about how they got a little coffee beverage or took a nice walk or started a book they've been meaning to read for a while or otherwise found meaning and joy in simple pleasures

my cat is incredibly sweet and wants nothing more than to be within a 5 ft radius of a person at all times, gently chilling in your orbit.
he is also VERY, VERY DUMB 

it’s a slow morning so husband and I are reading, not making much noise. meanwhile, Barold goes downstairs to use his box and when he comes out, he starts yowling like his lil heart done broke. husband goes to to the top of the stairs all worried like, “Barold, what’s wrong?”

kitty zips back up the stairs and just oozes onto husband’s feet, purring high-powered lawnmower style. the realization hit us both at the same time…

this. boy. this itty bitty kitty boy. 

he couldn’t see or hear us for ten continuous seconds, forgot. we. were. home. and immediately burst into tears !!!!

I was just focusing on the fact that you named your cat Barold for the entirety of that post

I want this cat to be named Barold Bluejeans so bad

Good news!

That is exactly his name!

Here is Barold Bluejeans in a bathtub!

The best news ever!!!!!😻😻😻

He’s an orange, that explains everything.

You can hear the dial tone in that gaze.

Hey yeah in the midst of all the hype and the strikes, can we PLEASE fucking talk about this

È stupendo 😍

the gimmick blogs are like tumblr’s rogue gallery. yes we’ve got some heroes, yes we’ve got some villains, but more importantly if you look over here you will see some freak who devotes all their time to counting the number of “t’s” in a post

T Count: 15

Letter Count: 198

Your T Percentage: 7.58%

Average T Percentage: 6.95%

You used the letter T 1.09 times as much as average!

YOU EXIST???

Sometimes you create a guy and it turns out they already exist

Sometimes that guy has skills beyond your comprehension @identifying-cars-in-posts

1993-1997 Mazda 626

I love all the fun kinds of autism we get here

They were so insane for this

Look at this point if something in a TV show feels off, my first, immediate response is, "who in the corporate office fucked them over?"

Wonky writing? Something feels rushed? Animation errors? First question should be, "Who was fucking over the production team? What were the censorship notes? Was this what the team actually wanted to do, or were they strong-armed?"

I think a lot of y'all are way too fast to blame the writers and animators for issues that wouldn't exist if the studio executives and the censors weren't fucking it up for everyone.

Pay the writers. Pay the actors. Pay the animators. And for god's sake, stop blaming them for industry-wide issues that the unions are actively trying to fight against.

I slept in and just woke up, so here's what I've been able to figure out while sipping coffee:

• Twitter has officially rebranded to X just a day or two after the move was announced.
• The official branding is that a tweet is now called "an X", for which there are too many jokes to make.
• The official account is still @twitter because someone else owns @X and they didn't reclaim the username first.
• The logo is 𝕏 which is the Unicode character Unicode U+1D54F so the logo cannot be copyrighted and it is highly likely that it cannot be protected as a trademark.
• Outside the visual logo, the trademark for the use of the name "X" in social media is held by Meta/Facebook, while the trademark for "X" in finance/commerce is owned by Microsoft.
• The rebranding has been stopped in Japan as the term "X Japan" is trademarked by the band X JAPAN.
• Elon had workers taking down the "Twitter" name from the side of the building. He did not have any permits to do this. The building owner called the cops who stopped the crew midway through so the sign just says "er".
• He still plans to call his streaming and media hosting branch of the company as "Xvideo". Nobody tell him.

This man wants you to give him control over all of your financial information.

not that i didn't want to believe you op, but i had to check that er thing out for myself, bc that just seemed too cartoonishly stupid to be real

but holy shit

haha ❤️ hilarious post my friend! *eyes narrow and my face goes stone serious* but it does not resonate with my own ideological schema, so i shall not be reblogging it

we need a fictional wheelchair user who does all the unrealistic bullshit cars and motorcycles do in fiction. i wanna see a wheelchair do the akira slide. i need a high speed chase with a nitro-fuelled wheelchair where the character out-maneuvers cop cars. does anyone understand me